I will Change, Accept, and Expect positively… I will Balance my LIFE…(II)




So, here we have more two things to realize before going into phase III, which are; Acceptance and Expectations.
Why these two? Because during the change process, there are some things we have to accept in life. One of my students came to me one day and told me, my mother! I can not talk with her at all. She is always even giving orders or shouting. I reached an extent that I do not talk with her at all. Even I don’t ask for advice or even listen to her, I just hear. She expected from me an opposite answer than the one I answered and she was shocked of that. I told her, have you ever thought to put yourself before in her position? Have you ever realized the reason why she is shouting? Have you ever think is there something wrong with her? She said; NO!! I told her ACCEPT. Accept because she is your mother, and she will never be returned back one day. Accept because if you do not, you will realize that you lost irrevocable time with her. You will never be back in time again. Then I started to tell her a story about a friend’s mum and how we put a plan for her to change. Her mum is a very independent, aggressive from the first sight, tough, decision maker, and also she does not know how to show her feeling at all. We discussed this with each other. On the other hand; this friend was totally the opposite of her mum, so sensitive, very smiley, lovable…etc. When she comes near to her mum to kiss or/and hug, her mum pushes her, depresses her, just giving orders and others. I saw her, talked with her a lot. Then we decided to start the plan we put. I told my friend; what do you want to do? You want to kiss your mum, to hug her, to let her feel that you love her instead. You miss her touch, hug, and kiss. You miss your chat with her. Okay!!! Let’s start. Go and hug her, she will push you, push her back, and kiss. Keep on kissing, do that many times a day to reach your satisfaction with her. Ignore her reactions as if there are no reactions. Continue your goal. Tell her that you want to kiss and hug her and that she has no other option so that she has to accept. Tell her that you really in need to talk with her, and talk in anything. Accept her and do what you want to do and feel satisfied. She did so and succeeded. Yes, she did so and now her mum kisses, hugs, chats with her. She did so and now when she feels bad or sad; her mum feels her and asks “What’s wrong?” My friend started to accept her mum, and at the same time she reached her goal with her, and also she changed her. It was really weird when her mum asked her “what’s wrong dear?” she accepted and then after this she realized that her mum is a person that is full of love and affection but she did not know that before, and her mum does not know the HOW to show. My student heard this, smiled, and told me; I understood what you want to deliver. I will start. So, here we have to know a thing that may be it is not clear for most of us. We have to start to accept, understand, realize, and keep on changing. After Acceptance, we see the other picture and realize the whole situation.
Now let’s go back to our ball game; or the rest four balance life balls; Family, Health, Friends, and Spirit; that are made of glass, and that can be damaged, scratched or/and broken. This balance is reached by the Change process in attitudes, beliefs we have talked about before.
I want you to know how to bring a balance in life by starting to realize the big difference. We will talk for a while about failures that we face in life. Failure is not a negative. It is a thing that we have to accept, continue, and begin a new beginning. Failure is a teacher, hard one but gives a perfect lesson to learn and accept. So, even if you fail, start over from the end point and change. Take this failure from the other view that it refines, polishes you. It is just an experience to pass and to start over, and never repeat. The steps you are taken after is the last story of life that you reach.
I remember one day, I read a book named “Living Happily” , the main thing the I really remember from that book that I will tell now is that; “YOU GET WHAT YOU EXPECT”. If I expect to reach and succeed, I will succeed. That’s the expectations method. After accepting I have to expect positively that I will reach as high as I can and could. The dreams you come in, come true when you expect to reach. We will talk about more expectations more.
So, let’s start balancing our life, change, accept, and expect positively.
Till we meet….

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